Today, I Remembered What Dopamine Feels Like

Today, for the first time in a long while, I managed to listen to music on SoundCloud while working.

It was such a strange feeling. I had completely forgotten what it's like to truly enjoy new music—the kind I actually love. Suddenly, my life became a movie again, with beautiful tracks playing softly in the background. I was genuinely high from that rush of dopamine.

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I also came across a fascinating quote today, attributed to Pascal:

"Entertainment is a barrier between man and the unbearable image of existence."

But here's the thing—every time I try to give myself permission to be entertained, guilt creeps in and ruins it.

Whether we like it or not, life right now feels ugly and unbearable for many of us. In the middle of all this, the least we can do is be kind to ourselves. Instead of drowning in irrational guilt, we should schedule a few plans or hobbies for ourselves each day or week. Something fun. Something just for us.

Lately, I've been thinking about filmmaking and watching more movies.

(Although, to be honest, simply having access to the internet has been a major source of dopamine for me lately too. But still…)